INFP

对INFP类型的人来说，最重要的是持有他们深信的信仰，并能与他们的价值观保持一致。INFP人总是充满好奇的透过他们玫瑰色的眼镜看人生。他们生活在一个完全颠倒的世界的边缘。在那儿，世间的万物得以复苏，动植物拥有近人性的特质。

INFP类型的儿童经常生活在“神话和现实”之间，从现实到虚幻，再回到现实。除了少数一些以外，这些儿童都有自己虚幻的玩伴（如格林童话中的“书橱女孩”安娜），也幻想着自己窒息而死的小动物能像Velveteen Rabbit和Skin Horse一样能复活。

INFP人在任何事物、任何人身上都能发现美的存在, 即使他们并不很惹人喜爱, INFP人都对其有极大的同情心。他们将最深层次的情感隐匿在心底，甚至有时连他们自己都觉察不到它，直到周遭环境的变化才能激起这股久藏的激情。

INFP人倾好于在失败中竞争，凭自认为完美的道德伦理奋斗着。

知性特质的哲学家型（INFP）

若你是一个哲学家型

想像一个幽深的、青葱的山谷，围绕着永远盛开的鲜花和树木，住着温柔地陪伴着人们的动物，而人们每天的生活都洋溢在爱、创造和无私的奉献当中。这是一个极小的(只有大约3%的人口)哲学家型的世界，这种人永远都在不断地付出努力，为了居住在一个只有爱与和谐的完美世界里。

当你恋爱时

一个哲学家型相信爱情需要深厚的情感和灵性的相连。你或许也会相信，要达到这种理想的状态，必须经历很多的痛苦和牺牲。然而，所有的苦难在完美恋情的寻获时都是值得的。当那一个幸福的日子来临时，你将成为一个完整的人，且能与你的爱人共创一个更美好的世界。

在一段感情一开始的时候，你倾向于把情人理想化，把他想像成全世界最了不起的人；甚至可以轻易地为了他放弃你自己的生活。之后，当现实面逐渐占满你的生活时，你会感到失望，因为你发现，并没有一个真实的人可以符合想像中创造的那个浪漫梦幻形象。幸运的是，梦想幻灭之后，你会渐渐地痊愈并且慢慢地接受伴侣的缺点，虽然你仍没放弃试图将他改变成你一开始陷入爱河时拥有的那个完美的形象。

你的最佳恋爱类型

许多研究发现，一个男性哲学家型最有可能和他的镜子影像结婚：也就是娶一个女性哲学家型。同时，研究也指出不管是男性或女性哲学家型，最快乐的事就是和同一种恋爱类型的人结婚。与哲学家型的人结婚的哲学家型，比起与其他任何一种恋爱类型结婚的哲学家型，都显现出最小的冲突。

若你是一个女性哲学家型

你与哲学家型的另一半在一起会很快乐，同时，也可以与作家型(INFJ)、教育家型(ENFJ)或记者型(ENFP)处得很好。由于教育家型和记者型拥有外向的特质，他们可以引导出你社会化的一面，也可平衡你原本内向的特性。

若你是一个男性哲学家型

你最好的伴侣是女性哲学家型或是女性作家型(INFJ)。女性作家型是一个有智慧、并具有反省能力的女性，她可以提供予你未来成功所需之要件。有一项警告：请确定她在果断(J)偏向上不是太强烈；否则，她对你的随兴作风也许会大有批评。

若你的理想情人是一个哲学家型

在哪里可以遇到一个哲学家型情人？

哲学家型喜欢写作、心理学、艺术和情感关系，他们会被有关改革或充满使命的活动所吸引。基本上，要遇到他们并不难，尤其是在与上述主题相关的地方。同时，也可以留意成人教育课程、读诗会和新书签名会。有时候在剧院、艺术走廊和博物馆也可以找到哲学家型—他们通常走得很慢，一个人沉浸在他们的思考中。

因为他们一心想要改进世界的欲望，哲学家型通常会为政治和慈善机构从事幕僚工作。基于每个人的背景和兴趣，在以下团体中可以找到他们：红十字会、癌症协会、心脏协会、绿色环保组织、拯救鲸鱼协会、政党组织以及和平协会。

一旦你知道去哪里寻找，要遇到你的哲学家型并不困难。例如，罗克珊是一个女律师，她回忆了她是如何遇到戴维—她一生中的至爱的：

“酒吧是我惟一知道可以遇到男人的地方。我在那里遇到了我的前夫，一个比安德鲁台风还要可怕的灾难。当我33岁时，我对酒吧和在那里认识的男人厌烦了，但是我无法想出还可以到哪里去寻找我的另一半。”

幸运的是，罗克珊参加了一场恋爱类型的讲座，并且学习到她的理想恋爱类型—哲学家型—是喜欢艺术的。

想起她年轻时对诗歌的热情，罗克珊决定去参加一个读诗社团以便结交一些志同道合的朋友。在数周的读诗活动后，她遇到了她完美的伴侣戴维，一个音乐家，同时是一个哲学家型。

“他有一个漂亮的臀部和红色的卷发！”罗克珊回忆说，“但是他很害羞。我3个星期来一直坐在他旁边，而他都没有跟我打招呼。

“终于，有一天在读诗会结束后，我问他是否知道任何关于16种恋爱类型的事。很巧的是他大学时主修心理学，他知道荣格关于人格类型的理论。

“很快地我们开始交换一些我对于宗教和灵性的看法，我们相互间的联系很紧密，仿佛我们已经认识对方很久了。我很兴奋，因为终于遇到心目中的理想情人了！”

如何与一个哲学家型情人约会？

哲学家型是所有恋爱类型当中最缺乏自信的。虽然他们通常在语言、艺术、音乐、心理学等领域都很有天分，但他们通常不会因自己的成就给自己加分。因为哲学家型对生活持有不安的态度，必须注意的一点是，当和他们谈话时要特别的温柔并敏感。

正面来说，哲学家型对关于心理学、哲学或与艺术有关的谈话非常有兴趣，这些话题打动他们对关系、意义和创意表现的追求。若可以了解一个哲学家型的兴趣，接下来就可以和他展开约会了。

举例来说，在一个美术班里，和你可爱的哲学家型同学开始一段谈话。谈谈你们最爱的画家，然后邀请这个新朋友和你一起去逛一个当地的画廊，一面去观赏刚刚提到的几个作品。又或许，在一个画展中，和站在身旁的哲学家型聊天，热中地谈论一个你知道下星期将举办一场签名会的作家。现在告诉他那场签名会的时间和地点，这样就有机会和他一起同往。

如何赢得哲学家型情人的爱？

你可以通过在安静、轻松的地方和哲学家型讨论激发性的哲学问题来向他们求爱。也许是手里拿着一本诗歌，沿着沙滩闲逛，也会吸引他们。也可以一起到一家温暖舒适的亚洲餐厅(哲学家型会对不同的文化着迷)，再把整个晚上约会的高峰推向一场艺术剧场的电影或哲学性的表演。

请记住：哲学家型是一个安静并且温柔的人，他享受亲密的陪伴和有意义的意见分享。虽然这个哲学家型伴侣会在一开始时不愿公开个人信息，一旦他开始进入状态后，这个温和说话的灵魂就会变成一个非常振奋人心的对话者。

*恋爱锦囊之一：避免在约会中起冲突。

若你是那种喜欢辩论争议性课题的人，请等你们两人建立起非常紧密的关系后，再表现你的善辩。因为哲学家型强烈的渴望和谐，他会尽量地避免冲突。若你太快就把不和谐的气氛带入一段关系中，哲学家型可能会觉得害怕而也许就不会再跟你约会。

*恋爱锦囊之二：话不投机半句多。

说太多话和太多社会活动会让一个哲学家型感到疲累。请尊重他对私人空间和安静时间的需要，你的伴侣会因而以感激和爱惜来回报。

看看这个例子，看看34岁的高中老师杰罗米，如何利用恋爱锦囊一和二，留给他未来的另一半拉提莎一个非常棒的印象的。

拉提莎是杰罗米心中100%的女子。她拥有可可色的皮肤、实际的个性和临床心理学硕士学位。最棒的是，她是他的理想恋爱类型—哲学家型。

现在的困难是：她的前男友正试图再度追求她，那男人是一个成功的银行投资家，他可以像公主一般对待她，带她到上好的餐厅去享受高级的餐饮。

幸运的是，杰罗米有他自己的秘密武器：恋爱类型系统。在一个他们共同的朋友引荐后，杰罗米努力吸引拉提莎哲学家型的感受力。他谈论她最爱的哲学、心理学和文学等话题，一面小心避免任何会导致争辩或冲突的议题。

拉提莎认为杰罗米很尊重她对安静时间的需要。当他们开始约会时，杰罗米总是会问她：“你累了吗？这里是不是太多人了？要不要到一个比较安静的地方？”

虽然有些女人会因为这些问题而厌烦，但拉提莎认为这样的问题表示杰罗米真的了解她并且关心她。很快，她的前男友变成了历史，目前拉提莎开始计划她和杰罗米的两人世界新生活。

*恋爱锦囊之三：保持应有的距离。

哲学家型可以像软糖般轻软温柔，除非他们感觉到你触犯了他们其中一个最重要的价值。当这样的事情发生时，哲学家型会以让你出乎意料之外的强硬和凶悍来回应。

因为哲学家型倾向把他们的情感藏在心里，你甚至不知道已经侵犯了他们重要的价值。当你明白发生了什么事情时，通常都已经太晚了：你的哲学家型情人累积的情绪爆发了，他或她会做出一些无可挽回且伤害感情的事。

看看发生在39岁的英文教授柯尔斯藤身上的故事。她无意中侵犯到她的哲学家型男友罗伯特，他是一个50岁有执照的社会医疗工作者。

“这是我们第3次约会，而我已经知道罗伯特就是我要找的人。”柯尔斯藤说。“他是我所见过最温柔且最贴心的男人，长得英俊，有半白的胡子和强壮的身体，他能让我心情愉快。

“然而我们的第一次争执发生了，这几乎让我们的关系结束。我们正在电影院排队准备看一部浪漫的电影，而罗伯特爆发了我从来没有看过的恐怖脾气。在群众面前，他开始大喊：‘我不敢相信你是这么一个跋扈的人。我要走了！’

“我吓呆了，接着他就离开了，而我之后3天都没有接到他的电话。在电影院这一幕可怕的情景后，我想要放弃他了，但我记起了一个哲学家型的价值之重要。

“我决定给罗伯特一个机会解释到底发生了什么事。我去他家找他，并且问他是什么事情让他如此生气。

“罗伯特说：‘你没有问我要看什么电影。我的前任妻子利用我随和的个性，从来不曾尊重过我的想法。我其实也想看那部电影，但我需要你的礼貌性询问，纯粹只是一种需要被尊重的感觉。’

“这实在是千钧一发；我们的关系有可能就在一开始时因为一个愚蠢的误会而被破坏，只不过是因为我忘记去检查我的哲学家型情人最深层的价值。

“在6星期的情侣治疗后，我们之间的关系好多了。这听起来很奇怪，但我很高兴这样的事情在我们感情之初发生，让我可以学习到这件非常重要的事—要对哲学家型情人的价值保持高度的敏感。”

为了防止发生类似柯尔斯藤和罗伯特这样的误会，请特别注意你的哲学家型情人情绪的转变。若是对方突然变得沉默、冷淡或在约会中好争辩，记得问清楚为什么。

若你的哲学家型情人指责你侵犯到他或她的价值，你可以再三保证说：“我真的很尊重且欣赏你的价值和感受；我在乎你以及你所相信的事物。”

当你采取这样的方式时，你的哲学家型情人会很快地忘记他感觉到的不受重视，而恢复成一个贴心并温顺的情人。你的伴侣会因而更爱你，因为他会相信你是这世上少数真正懂得体贴并关爱他的人。

如何和哲学家型情人拥有美好的性关系？

哲学家型是无可救药的浪漫型。在他们和你有性关系之前，他们必须感觉到被爱、被珍惜和被崇拜。他们必须觉得和你有心灵上的沟通：一种亲密可靠的热情联接。

这并不表示哲学家型是过于拘谨的人，或是说他们必须等到婚后才能有性生活。这只是意味着，在将他们的身体交付给你之前，他们必须感觉到一种情感的结合，以符合他们对真爱的理想期待。

一旦哲学家型感受到那股珍爱的契合，他们是非常温柔、体贴和热情的情人。对方会经常想着你，一边写着信件和诗歌来表达他们最深层的热情。

至于*，哲学家型通常在一开始时很害羞。虽然他们有很多爱恋和热情要付出、但他们需要对方温柔的循循善诱，直到他们可以放心表达他们自己。

**锦囊：吸引哲学家型情人高度的想像力。

在和你的伴侣*之前，也许要在两个小时之前，请他或她想像一个你们两个*的美丽和刺激的场景。通过这样的想像热身后，这个哲学家型情人将可以在真正的时刻来临时，更能表达他高涨的热情。

如何和哲学家型情人维持一段长久的关系？

相较起其他恋爱类型，哲学家型倾向晚婚或者一辈子不结婚。因为他们心里总有一份对于真爱的理想，使得他们在现实世界中实践他们的理想时总是碰到难题。

有一个女性的哲学家型，她在29岁时依然是处女，她说她若无法找到理想恋人，她宁可加入女修道院。她的家人不了解她，他们称她作“上帝的新娘”。但在她心底深处，却渴望和一个男人拥有一段完美的恋情：一段将会在情感上和心灵上改变她内心的关系。

哲学家型(包括男性和女性)在婚姻满意度上的得分都很高；他们的配偶通常对他们很满意。当哲学家型终于决定结婚时，他们将会是极棒的配偶，同时是一辈子的伴侣，因为他们拥有甜蜜和随和的个性。

若你可以赢得哲学家型情人的心，这个慈爱的人道主义者会让你了解，在两个相爱的伴侣共同携手之下，其实可以对整个世界带来正面、永生的影响。

The Idealist

As an INFP, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit into your personal value system. Your secondary mode is external, where you take things in primarily via your intuition.

INFPs, more than other iNtuitive Feeling types, are focused on making the world a better place for people. Their primary goal is to find out their meaning in life. What is their purpose? How can they best serve humanity in their lives? They are idealists and perfectionists, who drive themselves hard in their quest for achieving the goals they have identified for themselves

INFPs are highly intuitive about people. They rely heavily on their intuitions to guide them, and use their discoveries to constantly search for value in life. They are on a continuous mission to find the truth and meaning underlying things. Every encounter and every piece of knowledge gained gets sifted through the INFP's value system, and is evaluated to see if it has any potential to help the INFP define or refine their own path in life. The goal at the end of the path is always the same - the INFP is driven to help people and make the world a better place.

Generally thoughtful and considerate, INFPs are good listeners and put people at ease. Although they may be reserved in expressing emotion, they have a very deep well of caring and are genuinely interested in understanding people. This sincerity is sensed by others, making the INFP a valued friend and confidante. An INFP can be quite warm with people he or she knows well.

INFPs do not like conflict, and go to great lengths to avoid it. If they must face it, they will always approach it from the perspective of their feelings. In conflict situations, INFPs place little importance on who is right and who is wrong. They focus on the way that the conflict makes them feel, and indeed don't really care whether or not they're right. They don't want to feel badly. This trait sometimes makes them appear irrational and illogical in conflict situations. On the other hand, INFPs make very good mediators, and are typically good at solving other people's conflicts, because they intuitively understand people's perspectives and feelings, and genuinely want to help them.

INFPs are flexible and laid-back, until one of their values is violated. In the face of their value system being threatened, INFPs can become aggressive defenders, fighting passionately for their cause. When an INFP has adopted a project or job which they're interested in, it usually becomes a "cause" for them. Although they are not detail-oriented individuals, they will cover every possible detail with determination and vigor when working for their "cause".

When it comes to the mundane details of life maintenance, INFPs are typically completely unaware of such things. They might go for long periods without noticing a stain on the carpet, but carefully and meticulously brush a speck of dust off of their project booklet.

INFPs do not like to deal with hard facts and logic. Their focus on their feelings and the Human Condition makes it difficult for them to deal with impersonal judgment. They don't understand or believe in the validity of impersonal judgment, which makes them naturally rather ineffective at using it. Most INFPs will avoid impersonal analysis, although some have developed this ability and are able to be quite logical. Under stress, it's not uncommon for INFPs to mis-use hard logic in the heat of anger, throwing out fact after (often inaccurate) fact in an emotional outburst.

INFPs have very high standards and are perfectionists. Consequently, they are usually hard on themselves, and don't give themselves enough credit. INFPs may have problems working on a project in a group, because their standards are likely to be higher than other members' of the group. In group situations, they may have a "control" problem. The INFP needs to work on balancing their high ideals with the requirements of every day living. Without resolving this conflict, they will never be happy with themselves, and they may become confused and paralyzed about what to do with their lives.

INFPs are usually talented writers. They may be awkard and uncomfortable with expressing themselves verbally, but have a wonderful ability to define and express what they're feeling on paper. INFPs also appear frequently in social service professions, such as counselling or teaching. They are at their best in situations where they're working towards the public good, and in which they don't need to use hard logic.

INFPs who function in their well-developed sides can accomplish great and wonderful things, which they will rarely give themselves credit for. Some of the great, humanistic catalysts in the world have been INFPs.

What does Success mean to an INFP?

INFPs are creative, sensitive souls who take their lives very seriously. They seek harmony and authenticity in their relationships with others. They value creativity, spirituality, and honoring the individual self above all else. They are very tuned into inequity and unfairness against people, and get great satisfaction from conquering such injustices. An INFP is a perfectionist who will rarely allow themselves to feel successful, although they will be keenly aware of failures. INFPs also get satisfaction from being in touch with their creativity. For the INFP, personal success depends upon the condition of their closest relationships, the development of their creative abilities, and the continual support of humanity by serving people in need, fighting against injustice, or in some other way working to make the world a better place to be.

Allowing Your INFP Strengths to Flourish

As an INFP, you have gifts that are specific to your personality type that aren't natural strengths for other types. By recognizing your special gifts and encouraging their growth and development, you will more readily see your place in the world, and how you can better use your talents to achieve your dreams.

Potential Problem Areas

With any gift of strength, there is an associated weakness. Without "bad", there would be no "good". Without "difficult", there would be no "easy". We value our strengths, but we often curse and ignore our weaknesses. To grow as a person and get what we want out of life, we must not only capitalize upon our strengths, but also face our weaknesses and deal with them. That means taking a hard look at our personality type's potential problem areas.

INFPs are rare, intelligent, creative beings with many special gifts. I would like for the INFP to keep in mind some of the many positive things associated with being an INFP as they read some of this more negative material. Also remember that the weaknesses associated with being an INFP are natural to your type. Although it may be depressing to read about your type's weaknesses, please remember that we offer this information to enact positive change. We want people to grow into their own potential, and to live happy and successful lives.

Most of the weaker characteristics that are found in INFPs are due to their dominant Feeling function overshadowing the rest of their personality. When the dominant function of Introverted Feeling overshadows everything else, the INFP can't use Extraverted iNtuition to take in information in a truly objective fashion. In such cases, an INFP may show some or all of the following weaknesses in varying degrees:

Explanation of Problems

Nearly all of the problematic characteristics described above can be attributed in various degrees to the common INFP problem of only taking in data that justifies their personal opinions. INFPs are usually very intense and sensitive people, and feel seriously threatened by criticism. They are likely to treat any point of view other than their own as criticism of their own perspective. If the INFP does not learn how to deal with this perceived criticism, the INFP will begin to shut out the incoming information that causes them pain. This is a natural survivalistic technique for the INFP personality. The main driver to the INFP personality is Introverted Feeling, whose purpose is to maintain and honor an intensely personal system of values and morals. If an INFP's personal value system is threatened by external influences, the INFP shuts out the threatening data in order to preserve and honor their value system. This is totally natural, and works well to protect the individual psyche from getting hurt. However, the INFP who exercises this type of self-protection regularly will become more and more unaware of other people's perspectives, and thus more and more isolated from a real understanding of the world that they live in. They will always find justification for their own inappropriate behaviors, and will always find fault with the external world for problems that they have in their lives. It will be difficult for them to maintain close personal relationships because they will have unreasonable expectations, and will be unable to accept blame.

Its not an uncommon tendency for the INFP to look to the external world primarily for information that will support their ideas and values. However, if this tendency is given free reign, the resulting INFP personality is too self-centered to be happy or successful. Since the INFP's dominant function to their personality is Introverted Feeling, they must balance this with an auxiliary Extraverted iNtuitive function. The INFP takes in information via Extraverted iNtuition. This is also the INFP's primary way of dealing with the external world. If the INFP uses Extraverted iNtuition only to serve the purposes of Introverted Feeling, then the INFP is not using Extraversion effectively at all. As a result, the INFP does not take in enough information about the external world to have a good sense of what's going on. They see nothing but their own perspective, and deal with the world only so far as they need to in order to support their perspective. These individuals usually come across as selfish and unrealistic. Depending on how serious the problem is, they may appear to be anything from "a bit eccentric" to "way out there". Many times other people are unable to understand or relate to these people.

Solutions

To grow as an individual, the INFP needs to focus on opening their perspective to include a more accurate picture of what is really going on in the world. In order to be in a position in which the INFP is able to perceive and consider data that is foreign to their internal value system, the INFP needs to know that its value system is not threatened by the new information. The INFP must consciously tell himself/herself that an opinion that does not concede with their own is not an indictment of their entire character.

The INFP who is concerned with personal growth will pay close attention to their motivation for taking in information. Do they take in information to better understand a situation or concept? Or, do they take in information to support a personal idea or cause? At the moment when something is perceived, is the INFP concerned with twisting that perception to fit in with their personal values? Or is she/he concerned with absorbing the information objectively? To achieve a better understanding of the external world, the INFP should try to perceive information objectively, before fitting it into their value system. They should consciously be aware of their tendency to discard anything that doesn't agree with their values, and work towards lessening this tendency. They should try to see situations from other people's perspectives, without making personal judgments about the situations or the other people's perspectives. In general, they should work on exercising their iNtuition in a truly Extraverted sense. In other words, they should use iNtuition to take in information about the world around them for the sake of understanding the world, rather than take in information to support their own conclusions. The INFP who successfully perceives things objectively may be quite a powerful force for positive change.

Living Happily in our World as an INFP

Some INFPs have difficulty fitting into our society. Their problems are often a result of an unawareness of appropriate social behavior, an unawareness of how they come across to others, or unrealistic expectations of others. Any one of these three issues stem from using Extraverted iNtuition in a diminished manner. An INFP who takes in information for the sake of understanding the world around them, rather than one who takes in information only to support their own ideas, will have a clearer, more objective understanding of how society values social behaviors and attitudes. He or she will also be more aware of how they are perceived by others, and will have more realistic expectations for others' behavior within a relationship. Such well-adjusted INFPs will fit happily into our society.

Unless you really understand Psychological Type and the nuances of the various personality functions, it's a difficult task to suddenly start to use iNtuition in an Extraverted direction. It's difficult to even understand what that means, much less to incorporate that directive into your life. With that in mind, I am providing some specific suggestions that may help you to begin exercising your Extraverted iNtuition more fully:

• Take care to notice what people look like in different social situations. Look at their hair, their skin, their makeup (or lack thereof), their clothes, the condition of their clothes, their shoes, their facial expressions. Don't compare others to your own appearance, or pass judgment on their appearance, simply take in the information.
• Think of a situation in your life in which you weren't sure how to behave. Now try to understand how one or two other people would see the situation. Don't compare their behavior to your own, i.e. "she would know better than me what to do", or "why is it so easy for her, but so hard for me". Rather, try to understand how they would see the situation. Would it be seen as a problem, or as an opportunity? Would it be taken seriously or lightly? Try to determine their point of view without passing judgment or comparing it to your own.
• When having a conversation with a friend or relative, dedicate at least half of your time to talking about the other person. Concentrate on really understanding where that person is coming from with their concerns. Ask questions.
• Think of the people who are closest to you. As you think of each person, tell yourself "this person has their own life going on, and they are more concerned with their own life than they are with mine." Remember that this doesn't mean that they don't care about you. It's the natural order of things. Try to visualize what that person is doing right now. What things are they encountering, what thoughts are they having? Don't pass judgment, or compare their situation to your own.
• Try to identify the personality type of everyone that you come into contact with for any length of time.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve INFP Success

1. Feed Your Strengths! Encourage your natural artistic abilities and creativity. Nourish your spirituality. Give yourself opportunities to help the needy or underprivileged.
2. Face Your Weaknesses! Realize and accept that some traits are strengths and some are weaknesses. Facing and dealing with your weaknesses doesn't mean that you have to change who you are, it means that you want to be the best You possible. By facing your weaknesses, you are honoring your true self, rather than attacking yourself.
3. Express Your Feelings. Don't let unexpressed emotions build up inside of you. If you have strong feelings, sort them out and express them, Don't let them build up inside you to the point where they become unmanageable!
4. Listen to Everything. Try not to dismiss anything immediately. Let everything soak in for awhile, then apply judgment.
5. Smile at Criticism. Remember that people will not always agree with you or understand you, even if they value you greatly. Try to see disagreement and criticism as an opportunity for growth. In fact, that is exactly what it is.
6. Be Aware of Others. Remember that there are 15 other personality types out there who see things differently than you see them. Try to identify other people's types. Try to understand their perspectives.
7. Be Accountable for Yourself. Remember that YOU have more control over your life than any other person has.
8. Be Gentle in Your Expectations. You will always be disappointed with others if you expect too much of them. Being disappointed with another person is the best way to drive them away. Treat others with the same gentleness that you would like to be treated with.
9. Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself by assuming the worst. Remember that a positive attitude often creates positive situations.
10. When in Doubt, Ask Questions! Don't assume that the lack of feedback is the same thing as negative feedback. If you need feedback and don't have any, ask for it.