ESFP

工作

ESFP这一类人生性爱玩、充满活力,用自己的陶醉来为别人增添 乐趣。他们适应性强,平易随和,可以热情饱满地同时参加几项活动 。他们不喜欢把自己的意志强加于人。   

对于这类人来说,适合的工作是,能在实践中学习,利用常识搜 集各种事实来寻找问题的解决方案;他们喜欢直接与顾客和客户打交 道;能同时在几个项目或活动中周旋。尤其爱从事能发挥自己审美观 的项目或活动。


友好、开朗,爱开玩笑,活泼,天性喜欢与他人相处。喜欢与其他活泼、快节奏的人一起工作,同时也会根据判断做出不同选择。

对组织的贡献
Ø 为组织创造具有活力、热情、合作的氛围
Ø 为组织提供积极发展的规划
Ø 具有行动力,营造热情、轻松的气氛
Ø 协调人、信息、资源的关系
Ø 以接纳和尊重他人的方式与人相处,温和宽容地对待他人

领导模式
Ø 促进善意和合作的领导方式
Ø 喜欢从开头管理某个工程
Ø 消除紧张气氛,把人们带入轻松的情境里
Ø 关注解决即时出现的问题
Ø 促进人际间有效的交流
学习模式
Ø 利用充裕的时间通过讨论获取新知识
Ø 学习事实性的知识,搞清楚这些知识如何发挥作用的

倾向性顺序
(1)感觉,(2)情感,(3)思维,(4)直觉

解决问题模式
Ø 喜欢对情境进行现实和具体的评估,尤其是对于人更是如此
Ø 为获得最佳结果,需增强客观性,从长远的眼光看待不同事物

工作环境倾向性
Ø 喜欢与有活力的、轻松愉快、关注现实的人共事
Ø 活跃、行为定向的工作环境
Ø 培养快节奏做事的环境
Ø 有适应性强、喜爱自由的人的工作环境
Ø 强调和谐、友好、赞赏别人的环境
Ø 乐观的、注重交往的工作环境
Ø 有吸引力、丰富多彩的环境

潜在的缺陷
Ø 为保持和谐,过度强调主观性论据
Ø 行动前不太考虑眼前的事实
Ø 可能花太多的时间在社会关系上而忽视任务本身
Ø 常常有始无终

发展建议
Ø 为减少非个体性冲突,做决策时需理智分析决策的意义
Ø 进行管理工作前应事先制定计划
Ø 需平衡花费在任务和社会性交往上的时间
Ø 需致力于完成计划,对时间进行管理

ESFP:公关专业人士、劳工关系调解人、零售经理、商品规划师 、团队培训人员、旅游项目经营者、表演人员、特别事件的协调人、 社会工作者、旅游销售经理、融资者、保险代理/经纪人。   

生活

对ESFP类型的人来说,最重要的是有自然成长、游戏娱乐、结伴嬉戏的自由。所以这种人热爱人类、充满激情、好讲故事并好开玩笑。他们的本性 ------ 自然性------ 刺激着他们一直愉快的生活。无论在舞台上,工作中,还是在家里,他们都喜欢娱乐。大型的联欢会对这些"人性"的人们来说是最兴奋不过的事了。

有时候,ESFP人以"蜘蛛网"的方式思维、谈话 ------- 他们会从一点想到另一点,然后东说一点西道一点,而这在对方听来简直是莫名其妙、语无伦次,但最终他们又能回到最初所谈的问题上来。

ESFP人对新观点、新时尚,新玩意儿甚至一切新鲜事物都有强烈的兴趣。或许,正是生活的新鲜感吸引着他们去学前班和幼儿园甚至是上小学。

ESFP人喜欢跟人谈论人。一些最出色的故事演说家就是ESFP类型的人。

他们的务实------往往是朴素的机智------反映了他们诙谐的善意。

几乎每一个ESFP人都很健谈,在一个二十分钟的简短的"问题与回答"的对话中就可辨别出哪些是ESFP人。

对ESFP人的描述:
热情合群,好玩的;好奇健谈,易冲动;温柔敏感,有同情心的;好社交,对生活充满了无尽的热情;积极,有责任心,对物质世界有着高度的认识。

爱情

引人瞩目的表演者型(ESFP)

若你是一个表演者型

你喜欢娱乐大众,尽其所有地带给他们(和你自己)最多的爱、欢笑和热情。作为一位表演者型,你渴望聚光灯,同时享受着和所有你那个欢乐圈子的人们往来、打交道。最不快乐的事情就是叫你一个人独处,但幸运地,你并不常落单。对于真正的表演者型而言,生活是一场永不停止的狂欢聚会。

当你恋爱时

你对爱情的表达方式和性关系的亲密度是没有底线的。和你的情人在一起,可以轻易地变成24小时不停歇地沉醉于美食、饮酒和刺激的玩乐中。

不管是参加派对或休息,你总是希望与对方维系一种和谐的关系。因为你憎恨冲突,若两人发生争吵,你会觉得相当不舒服。如果你觉得这段关系太不和谐,你也许会突然收拾包袱离开旧情人,留下一头雾水的他在那里。

除了在爱情中临时性的顿挫,你很少有长时间的沮丧。对你而言,爱情是永无止境地制造欢乐。而你自己无疑就是那个许多人寻找了一辈子的恋爱振奋剂。

你的最佳恋爱类型

若你是一个女性表演者型

你偏好的恋爱类型是男性表演者型或挑战者型(ESTP)。和这两人其中一位在一起,生命都会是耀眼的火花,一连串永无止境的派对和有趣的社交活动。由于你们两人都认识非常多的人,你很有可能会拥有一个大型的结婚典礼。

若你是一个男性表演者型

你的最佳恋爱类型是表演者型或艺术家型(ISFP)。艺术家型也许可以提供你生活中缺乏的温柔,而那个充满活力的表演者型,将可以配合你高度的活力并且维持家庭之火的燃烧。

若你的理想情人是一个表演者型

在哪里可以遇到一个表演者型情人?

你可以在任何有灯光、动作、音乐和人群的地方找到表演者型,比如酒吧、慢舞俱乐部、喜剧俱乐部、餐厅、夜总会、舞蹈教室、宴会、赌场中心、剧院(许多演员是表演者型)和当地社区学院的表演班。

身为一名安静的艺术家型,女裁缝师艾贝尔下班回家后几乎哪里都不去。她休闲的时间都浪费在拜访她的已婚朋友身上,或照顾她姐姐的双胞胎小孩。29岁的她仍是孤家寡人,而她生命中一个最大的梦想—结婚生子,似乎非常遥不可及。

很幸运地,艾贝尔最要好的朋友莎莉,是一名恋爱类型的学生,她把这套系统介绍给艾贝尔:“你的最佳恋爱类型是那个有趣的表演者型,如果你要遇见他,你必须去像夜总会、派对或喜剧俱乐部等地方。就算什么事也没发生,你至少走出屋外去,给自己找点乐子。”

聚集了她所有的勇气,艾贝尔开始和莎莉于周二晚上外出参加她们当地的喜剧俱乐部。星期二的晚上,所有年轻可爱的喜剧演员都衣冠楚楚地出现。

艾贝尔很快地就发现了她的表演者型,一位27岁的喜剧演员蒂姆。他长得高高瘦瘦的,很聪明又非常机警。而他看起来似乎很喜欢莎莉,他一直和她眉目传情,并且在休息时对她微笑。

有一天晚上蒂姆走到她们的桌子旁边,开始用一个笑话逗艾贝尔发笑。她笑得眼泪直流,艾贝尔把她的电话号码给了蒂姆,之后他们就开始约会了。

如何与一个表演者型情人约会?

允许你自己去发觉你喜欢玩乐的那一面,去发现你和表演者型相似的部分。为了要唤起表演者型强烈情感层次的共鸣,你必须重新寻回童年时光—那一个不顾一切、只管玩乐的自己。

*约会锦囊之一:迎合表演者型对夜生活的喜爱。

提出所有曾经去过或听过的夜生活场所或餐厅,然后聆听表演者型评论它们,并在你的清单上再加上一大串场所,可能还可以邀请你的朋友和他同往。

*约会锦囊之二:请教你的表演者型关于举办宴会的方法。

表演者型喜欢帮助别人—尤其是关于促进社交活动。当你让一位表演者型加入社交活动的组织工作,他会创造一个欢乐的气氛。

如果你希望主办一个墨西哥式宴会,在你还没有来得及反应的时候,你的另一半已拉着你去采买啤酒、墨西哥脆饼和墨西哥帽了。接下来,邻近的影印店将开始印制大量彩色的宴会宣传单。

如何赢得表演者型情人的爱?

表演者型喜欢积极地参与每一个他们从事的活动,并从中得到乐趣。所以,你必须谨记,避免谈论任何有可能造成不愉快的话题(例如说你刻薄的老板或跋扈的兄弟)。虽然说这些题材对你而言也许很幽默、轻松和有趣,但请记住表演者型看待生活的方式和一般人不一样;他们要每一件事都和谐地进行。若你可以牢记这一点,并且避免任何会让逍遥自在的表演者型沮丧的话题,如此一来,你不仅帮了自己一个大忙,也帮了他们一个大忙。

除了前述的警告,你可以和表演者型出去尽情享受。想要跳一整个晚上的舞?没问题,表演者型一定奉陪。想要参加歇斯底里的玩笑和恶作剧?没问题。

会让表演者型兴奋的约会包括任何地方的开幕典礼、名人的聚会、剧院、音乐会、一家接一家的酒吧和任何可以找到明亮的灯光、刺激、戏剧、玩笑和欢乐人群的地方。如果那里没有宴会在进行,你可以放心,表演者型会自己办一场宴会。

你只要记住,进入表演者型内心的钥匙,就是了解他与生俱来的幽默感、想和许多人玩乐的渴望和对刺激自发性的追求。如果你是一个外向型的人,尽管去和你的表演者型享受狂欢的夜晚吧!如果你是一个内向型的人,让你的表演者型取悦你,并告诉他你是如何以安静及沉思的方式放松的。

如果你允许对方毫无拘束地表达他或她对生命的喜悦,你将发现身边这位伴侣,将会长久地让你快乐。

如何和表演者型情人拥有美好的性关系?

表演者型喜欢外出的外向个性和他们对细节的注意力,使他们成为成功的诱惑者。更重要的是,他们情感的火焰和非凡的魅力对异性而言很具催眠力量。

表演者型渴望在他们的性生活中拥有多变性及刺激。不同的姿势、性玩具、假发和服装都能吸引这种喜欢新鲜感的恋爱类型。

但请记住这一点:尽管他们拥有*的外表,但表演者型通常并不喜欢没有感情的性关系。在释放自己的性冲动之前,他们喜欢感觉到对方一定程度的温柔。

通常27岁的插画家戴安娜是羞于尝试表演的。但是,她知道参加表演班是一个遇见她的理想对象—表演者型的好地方,于是她决定姑且一试。在接下来的数周中,戴安娜认识了她生命中的重要的男人查德,一位28岁的*男演员。

当他们在课堂练习中一起表演时,戴安娜感觉被查德所散发出来那一股神秘及充满情欲的能量所吸引;她以前从来不曾对一个男人有过这种感觉。某一晚课程结束后,她答应了查德的邀请,和他一同到附近的一家酒吧喝饮料。

一边谈话、*并轻抚,戴安娜觉得自己被查德的容貌和魅力催眠了。戴安娜在家门外的一个离别前的轻吻,很快地就转变为一场狂热*。这是一个令人惊喜的狂喜之夜。

虽然这一切很美好,戴安娜却认为他们的邂逅只不过是一次*,不会再有后续。但查德确实在某次的表演课程中露面了。在那晚的课程结束后,他为那晚的轻率行为道歉,并且对戴安娜说他希望他们的感情关系能慢慢地发展,因为他真心喜欢她。

查德当然没有机会让一切的进展慢下来,因为戴安娜不会允许他慢下来。她在他们接下来的每一次约会中都诱惑他。

他们个性也非常适合,他们沉溺于彼此的陪伴中。接着,在6个月的热情过后,他们同居了。直到现在,他们仍然快乐地在一起。

如何和表演者型情人维持一段长久的关系?

虽然表演者型拥有许多正面的特质,这种恋爱类型也有一些缺点。研究指出表演型是所有恋爱类型中对婚姻有抗拒感的第二名(仅次于挑战者型),并且是在感情的不稳定倾向上也仅次于挑战者型。

由于他们善于社交(外向型)和随意(观察型)的个性,要表演者型觉得固定与一个人在一起是困难的,他们想要探索生命和*赐给他们的快乐。由于如此,尽管表演者型已经身处于一段感情关系或婚姻之中,他们仍然经常会被诱惑而出轨。

一旦他们果真出轨了,表演者型敏感的一面又会让他们觉得有罪恶感,然后他们通常会做出很多事情以修正他们的错误,例如鲜花、爱的宣言、令人惊喜的礼品和意外旅行。如果你的表演者型无缘无故对你特别亲密,请注意,他或她也许隐瞒了什么秘密。

当然,你别随便下结论或是太过疑心和太想占有(这样一定会将他赶走),但你要很清楚身处的状况。并且要小心,不要让那狡猾的魔术师用他迷人的魔力愚弄你。

除了这些发现,其实大部分的表演者型一旦真正陷入了爱河,他仍是很忠诚的。作为一个感觉者,他们有大量的关怀和真情,同时他们比任何其他恋爱类型者都擅长表达他们的爱,除了记者型(ENFP)之外。

要让表演者型对一段感情关系觉得满足,他们必须觉得他们是自由的(在一定尺度内),他们可以和他们喜欢的人从事任何他们想做的事,而不必面对他们伴侣的妒嫉或占有欲。只要尊重表演者型天生随意的性格及对生命的热忱,他将以忠诚、热情和乐观的爱来回报你。

要知道:当你和表演者型在一起时,将可以享受一段充满着好时光的感情。你的表演者型伴侣极为擅长让你觉得世界上的一切都是美好的。

综述

The Performer

As an ESFP, your primary mode of living is focused externally, where you take things in via your five senses in a literal, concrete fashion. Your secondary mode is internal, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit with your personal value system.

ESFPs live in the world of people possibilties. They love people and new experiences. They are lively and fun, and enjoy being the center of attention. They live in the here-and-now, and relish excitement and drama in their lives.

ESFPs have very strong inter-personal skills, and may find themselves in the role of the peacemaker frequently. Since they make decisions by using their personal values, they are usually very sympathetic and concerned for other people's well-being. They're usually quite generous and warm. They are very observant about other people, and seem to sense what is wrong with someone before others might, responding warmly with a solution to a practical need. They might not be the best advice-givers in the world, because they dislike theory and future-planning, but they are great for giving practical care.

ESFP is definitely a spontaneous, optimistic individual. They love to have fun. If the ESFP has not developed their Thinking side by giving consideration to rational thought processing, they tend to become over-indulgent, and place more importance on immediate sensation and gratification than on their duties and obligations. They may also avoid looking at long-term consequences of their actions.

For the ESFP, the entire world is a stage. They love to be the center of attention and perform for people. They're constantly putting on a show for others to entertain them and make them happy. They enjoy stimulating other people's senses, and are extremely good at it. They would love nothing more than for life to be a continual party, in which they play the role of the fun-loving host.

ESFPs love people, and everybody loves an ESFP. One of their greatest gifts is their general acceptance of everyone. They are upbeat and enthusiastic, and genuinely like almost everybody. An ESFP is unfailingly warm and generous with their friends, and they generally treat everyone as a friend. However, once crosesed, an ESFP is likely to make a very strong and stubborn judgment against the person who crossed them. They are capable of deep dislike in such a situation.

The ESFP under a great deal of stress gets overwhelmed with negatives thoughts and possibilities. As an optimistic individual who lives in the world of possibilities, negative possibilities do not sit well with them. In an effort to combat these thoughts, they're likely to come up with simple, global statements to explain away the problem. These simplistic explanations may or may not truly get to the nature of the issue, but they serve the ESFP well by allowing them to get over it.

ESFPs are likely to be very practical, although they hate structure and routine. They like to "go with the flow", trusting in their ability to improvise in any situation presented to them. They learn best with "hands-on" experience, rather than by studying a book. They're uncomfortable with theory. If an ESFP hasn't developed their intuitive side, they may tend to avoid situations which involve a lot of theoretical thinking, or which are complex and ambiguous. For this reason, an ESFP may have difficulty in school. On the other hand, the ESFP does extremely well in situations where they're allowed to learn by interacting with others, or in which they "learn by doing".

ESFPs have a very well-developed appreciation for aesthetic beauty, and an excellent sense of space and function. If they have the means, they're likely to have to have many beautiful possessions, and an artfully furnished home. In general, they take great pleasure in objects of aesthetic beauty. They're likely to have a strong appreciation for the finer things in life, such as good food and good wine.

The ESFP is a great team player. He or she is not likely to create any problems or fuss, and is likely to create the most fun environment possible for getting the task done. ESFPs will do best in careers in which they are able to use their excellent people skills, along with their abilities to meld ideas into structured formats. Since they are fast-paced individuals who like new experiences, they should choose careers which offer or require a lot of diversity, as well as people skills.

ESFPs usually like to feel strongly bonded with other people, and have a connection with animals and small children that is not found in most other types. They're likely to have a strong appreciation for the beauties of nature as well.

The ESFP has a tremendous love for life, and knows how to have fun. They like to bring others along on their fun-rides, and are typically a lot of fun to be with. They're flexible, adaptable, genuinely interested in people, and usually kind-hearted. They have a special ability to get a lot of fun out of life, but they need to watch out for the pitfalls associated with living entirely in the moment.

成长

What does Success mean to an ESFP?

ESFPs can't help but spontaneously grasp the moment, particularly if it offers a new sensation or experience. And while the ESFP might seem to others to only be interested in piling up new experiences, or reliving old ones just to savour the quality of the sensations or lively enjoyment they bring, the ESFP has in fact a far more subtle relationship to life and the world around them. Indeed, with their curious mixture of Extraverted Sensation and Introverted Feeling, the ESFP can show a wealth of complexity in their ways, even if to the ESFP themselves, considering such matters is felt to be a tedious and - to their way of seeing the world - quite unnecessary task. For this reason, just defining what success means to an ESFP requires more than simply assuming that a life filled with satisfying, quality experiences necessarily fulfills this criteria, as the ESFP's true needs and satisfactions will depend greatly on the strength and refinement of their Sensation and Feeling functions. But there is one thing that defines all ESFP's, and that is their exuberant abilty - and need - to engage with other people and express that which grips them. So, whilst success might come through many different paths, and be felt by the ESFP in modes and preferences not necessarily understood as success by other types, the successful ESFP will nevertheless always be found where they can live in full and open engagement with people and able to express their talents, appreciations and joys before the world at large.

Allowing Your ESFP Strengths to Flourish

As an ESFP, you have gifts that are specific to your personality type that aren't natural strengths for other types. By recognizing your special gifts and encouraging their growth and development, you will more readily see your place in the world, and how you can better use your talents to achieve your dreams.

Nearly all ESFPs will recognize the following characteristics in themselves. They should embrace and nourish these strengths:
 
  • A great ability to understand the objective world, its facts and realities
  • A talent for entertaining and pleasing others with words and actions
  • An aptitude for getting the most out of any situation or place
  • Very skilled at finding the best of things for themselves and others
  • A warm and generous attitude both as a giver and receiver
  • Exceptional natural musical and dramatic skills
  • A detailed and finely nuanced appreciation of the outside world
  • Adept at detecting and recognising the effects of minute changes to their environment
  • A talent for learning to do practically anything by just watching and doing
  • A reassuring and practical sense of the world which supports others
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    ESFPs who have developed their Introverted Feeling to the extent that they can integrate the concrete world of their perceptions with a responsive and healthy system of personal values will find that they enjoy these special gifts:
     
  • Their refined tastes will make it a joy for others to be in their company and homes.
  • Their abilty to weigh the value of their actions gives great force to their talent for entertaining people of all tastes.
  • They will quickly differentiate between those things which are of greater and lesser importance to a situation.
  • They will not just seek entertainment and things for their own sake, but will seek always to find that which they feel will provide the most value and reward for themselves and others.
  • The ESFP who augments their ability to recognize opportunities (Extraverted Sensing) with a strong internal value system (Intoverted Feeling) will find themselves more likely to attract, and be attracted into, very rewarding relationships with others - particularly with those of the opposite sex.
  • They will recognise and promote the talents of others.
  • They can be counted on to defend the best and most life promoting aspects of the world.
  • Potential Problem Areas

    With any gift of strength, there is an associated weakness. Without "bad", there would be no "good". Without "difficult", there would be no "easy". We value our strengths, but we often curse and ignore our weaknesses. To grow as a person and get what we want out of life, we must not only capitalize upon our strengths, but also face our weaknesses and deal with them. That means taking a hard look at our personality type's potential problem areas.

    ESFPs are kind and creative beings with many special gifts. I would like for the ESFP to keep in mind some of the many positive things associated with being an ESFP as they read some of this more negative material. Also remember that the weaknesses associated with being an ESFP are natural to your type. Although it may be depressing to read about your type's weaknesses, please remember that we offer this information to enact positive change. We want people to grow into their own potential, and to live happy and successful lives.

    Most of the weaker characteristics that are found in ESFPs are due to their dominant Extraverted Sensing function overshadowing the rest of their personality. When this function smothers everything else, the ESFP can't use Introverted Feeling to properly judge the value and propriety of their perceptions or actions. The first ten of the following weaknesses derive in varying degrees from this problem alone, whilst the rest are due to the additional effect of the ESFPs unique make up and result from their diminished capacity to use abstract reasoning.

  • May be seen by others as unnecessarily coarse in their behaviour and life choices.
  • May be unable to value or may ignore the preferences and needs of others.
  • May perceive even the most careful and objective criticism as simply a ploy to spoil their enjoyment of life.
  • May have skewed or unrealistic ideas about the feelings of others.
  • May be unable to acknowledge or hear anything that would lead to second thoughts or a more careful appreciation.
  • May blame their problems on the world at large, seeing themselves as frustrated heroes battling against the odds.
  • May become totally self-focused and oblivious to the havoc they wreak on others feelings.
  • May uncaringly use totally innapropriate social behavior simply to make a point.
  • May be overbearing in their judgements upon the taste and dress of others.
  • May come across to others as boastful and rash in their attitudes.
  • May rationalise the ways of the world in the most inane or simplistic ways.
  • May believe the most extraordinary things about inanimate objects and their workings.
  • May feel overwhelmed with tension and stress when driven into a situation which requires deep and careful consideration.
  • Under great stress, may feel the world around them is alive with dark, unseen influences.
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    Another difficulty, which is not so much a problem for the ESFP but for those around them, particularly if Introverted Thinking or Intuitive types, is that even when joyful or in the midst of life, they may be percieved as coldly self absorbed and oblivious to the feelings of others, even when the truth is quite the reverse. Should it somehow matter, then when in the company of such people, the ESFP should take some trouble to express their feelings and value judgements.

    Explanation of Problems

    Nearly all of the problematic characteristics described above can be attributed in various degrees to the common ESFP problem of being overly absorbed by the sensations and immediate apparent facts of the external world. ESFPs are usually very spontaneous and outgoing people who have little time for analysis of the complexities behind the world they live in. They are likely to treat any point of view other than their own rather shortly, waving away in particular the more intellectual and intuitive understandings of others as irrelevant and totally secondary to the obvious realities of life. If the ESFP does not learn how to deal with the tension that arises between, what to them, is the most obvious and satisfying way to deal with the world, and those deeper intricacies which lie behind its facade, the ESFP will begin to shut out any incoming information which produces this tension. This is a natural survival technique for the ESFP personality. The main driver to the ESFP personality is Extraverted Sensation, whose purpose is solely to perceive the realities of the external world and by which the ESFP orients themselves towards the things they need or desire. If an ESFP's image of the world is threatened by demands for careful judgement or reasoning, the ESFP shuts out the demand in order to preserve and honor their world view. This is totally natural, and works well to protect the individual psyche from getting hurt. However, the ESFP who exercises this type of self-protection regularly will become not only more and more careless of other people's needs and perspectives, but also cut off in a world where the facts and realities which they perceive become interwoven with a belief system which supports only the ESFPs desire driven view. Under such circumstances they will justify their own inappropriate behaviors in the most astounding or rationally simplistic ways, and will always find fault with others for trying to complicate and disturb what ought to be a simple and obvious way of life. It will be difficult for them to maintain close personal relationships because they will not only have unreasonable and simplistically concrete expectations, but will be unable to understand why such expectations cannot be easily met.

    Its not an uncommon tendency for the ESFP to look to their inner world only for feelings that justify their desires and perceptions. However, if this tendency is given free reign, the resulting ESFP personality is too self-centered to be happy or successful. Since the ESFP's dominant function is Extraverted Sensing, they must balance this with an auxiliary Introverted Feeling function which is sufficiently refined to make reasonably objective judgements about the value of the ESFPs actions and the people and things in their life. The ESFP makes value judgements via Introverted Intuition. This is also the ESFP's primary way of dealing with their own internal subjective world. If the ESFP uses Introverted Feeling only to serve the purposes of Extraverted Sensing, then the ESFP is not using Introversion effectively at all. As a result, the ESFP does sufficiently consider the effects of their actions and perceptions sufficiently for a strong value system to arise in their personality. They see nothing but the joys, satisfactions and sensations of the world outside themselves, and deal with feeling only so far as it supports their need for constant stimulation and gratification. These individuals can often come across as coarse and lustful, although can just as easily seem the complete opposite, as refined and tasteful connoisseurs who, nevertheless, at closer quarters reveal their complete indifference to anything but the satisfaction of their own desires.

    At this point, I would like the reader to understand that, as with all personality types, serious problems are usually only encountered by those whose dominant function is unusually strongly expressed against the other functions. Such situations are rare and although the problems discussed here can indeed be felt to some level by all ESFPs, most people regardless of their personality type tend toward a balance within both their personal and worldly relationships which occurs despite differences in personality preference; a balance driven by the need for comfort in others and the human capacity for love. So whilst it is essential for us to fine tune our relationships through knowledge and understanding of our differences and peculiar needs, it is also good for us to remember that the most simple and childlike longings of the heart can also be most powerful guides to happiness.

    Solutions

    To grow as an individual, the ESFP needs to focus on increasing their self understanding to allow a rational and more objectively reasoned value system to arise within themselves. In order for the ESFP to more validly judge the the value of their desires, actions and the things they allow into their world, the ESFP needs to know that their world view is not being threatened but qualitatively reinforced by the strength and objectivity of their judgements. The ESFP must consciously tell himself/herself that a feeling that does not agree with their desires or perceptions of the world is not an indictment of their character but a clue to greater understanding.

    The ESFP who is concerned with personal growth will pay close attention to their motivation for valuing certain actions, interests and possessions over others. Do they attend to their feelings to judge such things according to a strong set of values which accords also with the needs of others? Or, do they judge only to support a personal desire? At the moment when something is felt, is the ESFP concerned with adjusting that feeling to fit in with what appears to them as the most important things in the world? Or is she/he concerned with allowing their feelings to be fully realised? To achieve a better understanding of their feelings, the ESFP should try to allow feelings their full force, before setting them against their strong desires. They should be consciously aware of their tendency to discard anything that doesn't agree with their immediate sense of appearance, and work towards lessening this tendency. They should try to see situations from other people's perspectives, without making personal judgments about the situations or the other people's perspectives. In general, they should work on exercising their Feeling in a truly Introverted sense. In other words, they should use Feeling to understand how the world of their perceptions affects their inner life, using it to discover the values that truly matter, rather than simply to support their wishes. The ESFP who successfully creates a strong value system can be quite a powerful force for positive change.

    Living Happily in our World as an ESFP

    Some ESFPs have difficulty fitting into our society. Their problems are often a result of an uncaring attitude to anything other than the moment, an unawareness of the needs of others, or too simplistic a set of expectations. All of these issues stem from using Introverted Feeling in a diminished manner. An ESFP who uses feeling to judge the value of their perceptions and actions, rather than one who uses it only to support their desires, will have a clearer, more refined appreciation of the world and what it can offer. He or she will also be more aware of how others may feel, and will have more realistic expectations for others' behavior within a relationship. Such well-adjusted ESFPs will fit happily into our society.

    Unless you really understand Psychological Type and the nuances of the various personality functions, it's a difficult task to suddenly start to use Feeling in an Introverted direction. It's difficult to even understand what that means, much less to incorporate that directive into your life. For the ESFP, the most important thing is to recognise and understand that Feelings must not be confused with sensations or the emotions they unleash. Quite often we say "it feels good" when we really mean that the sensation we are experiencing is good. The sense of "Feeling" from a psychological viewpoint is that it underlies that rational, judging factor which discriminates rightness or applicability from wrongness or misapplication, guilt from pride etc. With this in mind, I am providing some specific suggestions that may help you to begin exercising your Introverted Feeling:

    • When a new prospect enters your life and stirs your appetite, sit with it for a moment in your mind and allow yourself to notice whether you have a lurking judgement about it. Try to allow this judgement to come forward on its own behalf and do not try to rationalise it nor be afraid of it. Imagine that you are hearing this judgement from the lips of another person, or perhaps from God, anything to let it be felt objectively within your mind. What is your Feeling function saying about what your exciting new prospect really means to you?
    • Think of a situation in your life in which you are sharing your joys and enthusiasms with others, perhaps entertaining them. Perhaps you are an entertainer. Watch the looks and body language of others as you speak or perform and notice that not all seem to be offering the same emtional responses to your words or actions. Each one is feeling you a different way, judging you a different way. Try to notice the same function within yourself now, the responsive person within you who is also judging your words and actions. How is he/she reacting to you?
    • When having a conversation with a friend or relative, dedicate at least half of your time to discovering their values and reasons. Concentrate on really understanding why they feel as they do. Ask questions, and take some time later to ask those same questions of yourself.
    • Think of the people who are closest to you. As you think of each person, tell yourself "this person has their own life going on, and they are more concerned with their own life than they are with mine." Remember that this doesn't mean that they don't care about you. It's the natural order of things. Try to visualize what that person is doing right now. What are they feeling, what judgements are they possibly making about what is happpening to them? Don't compare their situation to your own, just try to discover how you would feel in their situation.
    • Try to identify the personality type of everyone that you come into contact with for any length of time.

    Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve ESFP Success

    1.     Feed Your Strengths! Encourage your natural expressive abilities and hands-on talents. Nourish your appreciation of the world. Give yourself opportunities to enjoy life to the full.

    2.     Face Your Weaknesses! Realize and accept that some traits are strengths and some are weaknesses. Facing and dealing with your weaknesses doesn't mean that you have to change who you are, it means that you want to be the best You possible. By facing your weaknesses, you are honoring your true self, rather than attacking yourself.

    3.     Express Your Feelings. Don't let worries build up inside of you. If you are troubled by doubt or fear, tell those close to you who will listen and offer counsel. Don't make the mistake of "blipping over it" or "sorting it out" some quick fix way.

    4.     Listen to Everything. Try not to accept everything at face value. Let everything soak in and listen to your feelings.

    5.     Smile at Criticism. Remember that people will not always agree with you or understand you, even if they value you greatly. Try to see disagreement and criticism as an opportunity for growth. In fact, that is exactly what it is.

    6.     Be Aware of Others. Remember that there are 15 other personality types out there who see things differently than you see them. Try to identify other people's types. Try to understand their perspectives.

    7.     Be Accountable for Yourself. Remember that your every word and action affects those around you, so it is important for you to be fully responsible for your self, and to the values you hold.

    8.     Be Gentle in Your Expectations. You will always be disappointed with others if you expect too much of them. Being disappointed with another person is the best way to drive them away. Treat others with the same gentleness that you would like to be treated with.

    9.     Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself by assuming the worst. Remember that a positive attitude often creates positive situations.

    10. When in Doubt, Ask Questions! If something seems to be wrong and you can't put your finger on it, maybe someone else can. Remember, there are many ways of seeing the world, and perhaps someone else's way will reveal the truth.